Ghosts – Poem

I remember when my world changed and I opened up my soul
And allowed my heart to feel the things I thought were once too bold
I used to never let myself have the wishes my spirit requested
I’d ask for permission in the form of advice; waiting for approval or rejection
I used people’s opinions as a means to guide me to the things I thought I wanted
But as time passed, I realized the only thing I often felt was haunted.
Haunted by ME! What a betrayer I thought; I thought I was doing so well
But to live my life through the approval of others is its own kind of personal hell
In all of my yielding to another’s thoughts, I allowed them control over my life
And the more I did it, the more ghosts arrived, and with them, disappointment and strife
I’ve been living another’s wishes, all their wants, all their goals and dreams for my God-given soul
I’ve fulfilled empty expectations reaping barren treasure chests that gave me no joy of my own
I looked at the phantoms and forgave myself for not pursuing my own passions worth my hassle
Years from now, looking back, I want proof of that I lived, not ghosts in my memory’s castle.

Made of Stardust – Poem

I am made of stardust, the earth shivers under my skin
Glittering diamonds robust with lust for the mystery buried within
I kiss the sky and watch it quake and shake to commandeer
The lightning, thunder tearing asunder the fragile atmosphere
In a desperate attempt to make amends for the troubles that I cause
I shove my cheeks beget with tears into hands covered in gauze
Crumbling beneath a facade of perfection dismissive of my flaws
See, I am made of stardust, a cosmic meteoroid stone
Impressive from a distance, larger than life, an origin unknown
An unearthly disaster in a breathless space, only God is the one who polices
Thousands of fiery miles per hour, shattering planets to pieces
The destruction I cause, I never did mean, wanting contact to be friendly in the making
I should have forewarn, I know no subtlety; I dont know how to touch without breaking.

-Kamalia july1st2019

Minutes to Never – Poem

I woke up this morning, eyes still red and puffy, dried streaks of tears once there,
My heart still heavy, burdened, A levee, by the memories we once shared
One life, one moment, one laugh, one love; flooding thoughts of my soul about you
Not one minute, one smile, one touch in a while, until I am in heaven with you
“I don’t know how I’ll make it,” I think to myself as every tomorrow now comes without you
One step, One prayer, One day at time is what I’ll need to make it through,
You’ve run the good race at God’s given pace; you’ve taught me His way again and again
The tears may still run but a smile now comes as I know that this isn’t the end.
I’m here on earth while you’re heavenbound; the Lord called you home and you answered His call
Though this hurts so much, I’m glad to have known you for a minute than never at all.